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I’ve had a lot of fun looking up this stuff.

Makes Supermalt look like warm milk. Magnum, it turns out, is a Jamaican "Tonic Wine" which is marketed as "increasing male libido".

It is, hold on to your hats: 16.5% proof alcohol, and contains made-up snake-oil mystery ingredient "VIGORTON" which I have yet to find a satisfactory definition/explanation of.

On my way around the virtualcyber-i-Web.2.0.0-’o'net I discovered a beautifully funny website called DeathwishIndustries ahem, dot, er, com. Which has a very in depth article all about alcoholic energy drinks, which rates Magnum as the worst tasting mad shi∗t that their Uncle Jack had ever come across. In fact, I think he may have baulked at actually tasting it on the grounds of its foul smell alone.

Also, there is a lovely article from the Bermudan "Royal Gazette" about a fast ferry pilot who crashed his boat full of passengers because he was out of his mind on six bottles of the stuff. When arrested by police they found him, "unsteady on his feet and spraying himself with air freshener".

Well worth your while putting MAGNUM VIGORTON into google and reading that one. It’s about the first result you’ll get.

And if anyone out there really does know what Vigorton really is, I’d be very interested to hear it. Or just make up a plausible sounding lie, if you like.

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